Growing up, I didn’t know what to do. I hopped from hobby to hobby, starting with rock collecting and eventually becoming a photographer.
Rock collecting brought me lots of trouble, even though I never truly collected rocks. I just had the Shakespeare Spider-Man play box, and I would put random rocks I found while walking around my neighborhood inside it. I remember getting really into it when my sister cracked open a rounded rock, and it was sparkly inside. My 12-year-old brain was fascinated by the sight, so I started breaking open rocks to see how cool they really were and, on occasion, stealing white marble chips from a random guy’s front lawn.
My older brother got mad at me one time while we were walking home from Scotty’s Market after buying groceries. He threatened to leave me there if I didn’t put the rock back. This scared the shit out of me because we had just moved to the area, and I didn’t know my way home. I ended up leaving some rocks behind, but I kept two in my pocket to add to my collection. I eventually stopped collecting rocks, but sometimes I still look at one and think to myself, “Ooo, what a nice rock.”
I moved on from collecting rocks to art. I started with a drawing tablet and later got into painting. Eventually, I quit because it wasn’t really my style and moved on to puzzles.
I grew up with puzzles, but I never really got into them until I got a computer. I was bored out of my mind and wondered if there were any online puzzles. I found a website called Jigsaw Planet and probably spent two hours at a time doing puzzles and trying to beat my previous times. Even though I had never seen Star Wars, I had an old Star Wars puzzle that showed Luke and Darth Vader fighting. I probably completed that puzzle 100 times while sitting on the floor, sometimes passing out before I could finish it. Sometimes I would even try to do it flipped over so I couldn’t see the picture.
I remember staying up until midnight with my mom, trying to complete a Costco puzzle she had brought home. That’s just something she does to try to get close to me.
I lived in three apartment buildings, at least from what I can remember. Excluding the first apartment, each one had a pool in the middle that I could look down on from the balcony. The reflection of the bright blue pool floor, distorted by the bug-filled water, would dance across the ceiling above me. I could sit on the grass and watch the waves ripple across the pool for hours if my mom didn’t eventually drag me inside to eat, which isn’t much of a problem anymore since I’m usually the one looking for food.
I remember one time seeing a water strider skating across the surface of the pool. I was freaking out because I didn’t know what the hell that was. Being born in July meant I practically grew up with pool parties. Every year, my mom would send invitations to my sister’s friends, my friends, her friends, and even people from around the apartment complex.
What I remember most are the piñatas. As soon as they broke open, I would throw myself on top of them while the other kids tried to pull candy out from underneath me. I was a pretty small kid, so they usually managed to steal most of it, but I still ended up with a handful of candy every year. Eventually, I got bored with the tradition and started celebrating with smaller gatherings that were just family.
When I was around nine years old, my brother would take me on walks from our first house to the 7-Eleven down the street to get Icees. We lived across from my elementary school, Short School Elementary. The school closed in 2020 and later reopened as the San Rafael Early Learning Center at Short School.
Icee days were always my favorite because we would run into a calico cat that came out every time we passed the car it lived under. I would daydream about bringing it one of those trays of cut fish from the grocery store. Cats became my new favorite animal, replacing penguins, which I still think are pretty cool.
My obsession with cats and penguins followed a similar path. I had stuffed animals, stickers, and anything else related to them. Whenever we visited a zoo or Six Flags, I would always rush to see the penguins first. My brother was obsessed with cats, too, and he would take my sister and me to visit them whenever he got the chance.
I remember one time during COVID when we visited a cat café. We had to show our vaccination cards just to buy a store-bought drink and spend 30 minutes with cats that would run away the moment you got close to them.
My brother has been a major influence on my life, even now. He taught me how to skate, took me on walks, and always kept me grounded.
“Brian, what do you want to be when you grow up?” became his favorite conversation starter whenever we went out to eat at our usual spot, Ping’s Chinese Cuisine.
Honestly, I didn’t know. Maybe I was too young to have a realistic answer.
“I want to become an artist,” I said one day while lying in the back seat of his car. My mom sat in the front. We were driving home from Target. I was 10 years old, and he was 25.
It was kind of messed up to tell a 10-year-old that his dream was unrealistic, but my brother didn’t care.
“You can minor in art, but pick something better,” he said.
“But I want to become an artist. I can go to art school and everything.”
“But it’s not realistic. It’s not safe. You’re not guaranteed a job, and you might not make any money. Do you really want that?”
I stopped replying because I was annoyed, but I also knew he had a point.
This conversation came up every year. It happened when I wanted to become an artist. It happened when I wanted to become a photographer. It only stopped when I said I wanted to make games, which he still complained about. Eventually, we settled on computer science because it seemed more practical and paid well.
Later, I dropped that idea and moved on to math, but math was lame. Eventually, I landed on chemical engineering because Ms. Pikk, the chemistry teacher at San Rafael High School, got me interested in chemistry, and I am a math demon.
I’ve spent my life picking up and dropping hobbies, traditions, favorite animals, and career ideas. I’ve tried everything, which kind of reminds me of the samples at Costco. You can try as many as you want, but you don’t leave with anything until you find something you actually like.
It also reminds me of the huge variety of things Costco sells, from rotisserie chickens to bounce houses. There are so many options that it’s hard to choose, and the samples help you figure out what you really want.
For me, that would be the pesto chicken sandwich, which was probably the best Costco purchase I’ve ever made. Now that I’m out of college, even though it’s just community college, I’m glad I took that time when I was younger. My passion for math and chemistry, photography, cats, and enjoying my time with my family is what I actually want to do with my life.
